LOCOMO: INBOX

[testgasm]

@ WHEATLEY

GREETINGS, hello, welcome, you've reached Wheatley and the E2 branch of Aperture Laboratories. I'm...not actually here right now, if you haven't guessed. Off doing something very important, very sciencey, I'm sure, but go ahead and leave me a message, and I'll get right back to you. Depending. On. The nature of your call. But I'll, ah. Most likely respond within some kind of acceptable time frame.

✉️ ☎️ 📷

Comments

[himbomb]

[Oh, now they're talkin'. Finally! Somebody who knows how to work a goddamn phone. Invincible does not count, he's an idiot.]

ok since we are all literally from different DIMENSIONS

like i get it but dontchu care

cmon, my lil booby boi!!!!!

[REX????]

aren't u curious? about who/where/why/WHAT thE FAQQQQ brought us here

cuz i am

1/2

[testgasm]

again

i have a name

[testgasm]

of course i'm curious but i'm also not terribly inclined to rock the boat

train as it were

[himbomb]

well i sure as hell am! don't break my ❤️!

wheatley, baby, coooooome on!

pwetty pwease ☹️😢😭

dw! ill protect ya. i've got big strong arms n everything 💪🏽

[testgasm]

okay look what is it you're asking me exactly

do you think that because i've got the network downloaded into my brain instead of on a phone i'm privy to its secrets or something

[himbomb]

[...Ah, so the robot takes him for a fool.

Well, he wouldn't be the first.]

that would be a resounding NO, asshole

dude! ur a fucking ROBOT

you of ALL!!!! ah gragh UGGGGH things

should know how h a c k i n g works! look, i'm not trying to shut down any MAINFRAMES or anything bc oh GOd do we need this shit but (🍑!!!)

[insert the spirit of a deep inhalation here]

what i WOULD like to know?

is if all of us interdimensional motherfuckers are being TRACKD

OKAY

and if so, what are they using? idk if heat signatures make sense bc there are like... creatures in here u kno who are native to this loco locomotive

[testgasm]

yes? i am a robot but i'm starting to wonder what you know about robots

if you wanted something hacked you should've just asked but i'm also not going to be able to do any of that unless we find me a direct line into the train itself

network seems to be an isolated system sorry to say

not me a med student knowing nothing about hacking and writing some bs

[himbomb]

isolated, huh? figures

[Of course. This place has its own system. But, every line of ]

AI isn't really my personal bag, but, aaaaah

mostly i work (or well, worked) with encrypted and private information networks- findin ppl, places, n things

mostly ppl tho, specifically the ones that didn't wanna be found

[Also- Security systems. But he won't mention that just yet.]

[testgasm]

so you want to look for whoever's running this place or find out what kind of information they might have on us i get it

what do you need me for then

[himbomb]

i just think ur cute 😚❤️

[IS... HE??? FLIRTING??? WITH THE ROBOT]

also, i feel like you'd make a great bowling ball tbh

[oh nvm he's just clowning him we fine]

im more into the 'NASTICS grind myself? but i could stand to learn a few new tricks

i'm not THAT old of a 🐶

woof woof

[testgasm]

ugh

fine if you find an access port or something let me know i'd be willing to take a look at it

especially if it makes you stop whatever this is

[himbomb]

awwwwwh, babe! you're KILLIN me over here

⚰️

if i find one, i'll letcha kno, wooty woot

[It's "Wheatley..."]

[testgasm]

right thanks

good talk